In the spirit of Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda – the interactive book with unlimited chances to start the love story again – the Doorflower Dating Do-Over from A Questionable Friendship Author, Samantha March.
I had to think long and hard about the direction I was going to take this dating do-over post. Because really, if I had the chance, would I go back in time and change my decisions? I honestly don’t think I would. Each relationship has happened for a reason I believe, each decision a part of my life because it needed to be. Have I had all great relationships? No. Some were downright terrible. Some were silly. Some were so much fun but not really meaningful. But for my subject of the post, I’m going to talk about the one that still causes me to scratch my head and think to myself, “Really?!”
I had a hot streak going my senior year of high school and freshman year of college. I dated really great guys. While they might not have lasted long, these guys were genuinely great people. Good boyfriends. I was lucky. I bounced from one to another to another, thinking I was one lucky chick. I picked guys with nice families, strong motivations, and guys that people said, “he’s just so nice!” I was treated well. But each of those relationships ended, and after the third one ran its course, I started thinking. Why weren’t the nice guys working out for me? Did I deserve…a bad boy? I was a sophomore in college, not looking to settle down, so I thought, why not? Why not see what this “bad boy” craze was all about? So, I picked one. And seven years later, I still look back and think “Really?!”
The guy I dated wasn’t bad to me, I’ll say that. He just wasn’t my type. And he smoked. I still can’t quite believe I dated a smoker. I’m really not even sure how to describe him being a bad boy to make you understand. I’ll just say how other people said my ex-boyfriends were “so nice” – no one described him this way. A lot of eyebrows went up when I told people we were dating. We didn’t match, it was pretty clear to see. But for some reason, I was determined to get this “bad boy” phase out of the way.
We actually ended up dating for six months, and when we finally called it quits I think we were both relieved. We just weren’t right for each other. The reason I want this dating do-over is because I felt like my time was wasted. When I could have just worried about having fun in college with my girlfriends, I spent it worried that my boyfriend was going to get too drunk at a party or hit on other chicks. The funny thing is, I’m still friends with this guy today. I’m actually going to his wedding in two weeks, and he attended mine last year. He’s found himself a terrific girl and I’m so happy for him, and I found my perfect match as well.
My husband and I celebrated our one year anniversary on September 7, and I truly couldn’t be happier with where my life went. I have a husband, one that people say is “so nice,” who treats me well and is my biggest supporter. We have an adorable puppy who also is turning one soon and we’re building an amazing life together. Fun fact: I started dating my now husband after my relationship with the “bad boy” fizzled out. So maybe he shouldn’t be my dating do-over. Maybe dating him taught me what I really wanted in my partner, and led me straight to him. But I don’t want to write this post over again, so I’m going to stick with what I have. And for all you ladies that go through your own “bad boy” phase – good luck and cheers to you my friends. I hope you find your guy on the other side!
Samantha March is an author, editor, publisher, blogger, and all around book lover. She runs the popular book/women’s lifestyle blog ChickLitPlus, which keeps her bookshelf stocked with the latest reads and up to date on all things health, fitness, fashion, and celebrity related. In 2011 she launched her independent publishing company Marching Ink and has three published novels – Destined to Fail, The Green Ticket and A Questionable Friendship. When she isn’t reading, writing, or blogging, you can find her cheering for the Green Bay Packers. Samantha lives in Iowa with her husband and Vizsla puppy. Connect with Samantha on Facebook and Twitter.